A Few Words on Baby Clothes

Prior to the pregnancy and during it, I'd imagine how cute my baby will look in this outfit and that outfit. I found myself at baby clothing stores wanting to buy everything based on how adorable they looked. I could picture myself playing baby dress up with the child growing in my tummy. Little did I know that this wasn't going to be the case.

When I finally got to hold my little man in my arms, I ended up thinking that he was more fragile than he really is. Because of this, when I had to change his clothes, I worried that I would break his frail bones or do something that would harm him. My husband still, after 8 weeks, is scared to change Ben when he's wearing a shirt that needs to be pulled over his head. During baby's first wardrobe change, we quickly found that he doesn't particularly like being changed and sometimes might even protest with tears. Then we ended up tensing up and just wanted the experience to be over. By the time I was done doing what should have taken no longer than a minute, sweat rolled down my forehead and I wondered why it took so long. I was angry with the clothing makers who haven't taken into consideration the fact that you're changing a newborn and they haven't made their clothing infant-friendly.

During the first three weeks of Ben's life, I've dressed him exclusively in one piece sleepers simply out of convenience. They're very easy to put on compared to two piece outfits (one less thing to put on him!!). Since I was changing diapers from anywhere between 10-15 times a day , it allowed me to do it easily and quickly because of the easy access to the diaper area.

The only bad thing about this was the fact that when I finally went through his wardrobe, I found that he had already outgrown some of his clothes! I was so upset about this but then realized there was nothing I could do about it. Even now, I still would choose convenience during the first few weeks. One-piece sleepers were cute enough for when visitors came and they got the job done.

Every now and then, we have "photo-shoot sessions" when I dress him up in a bunch of outfits that are just one size too big and take tons of pictures. This way, I can send photos to the person who gifted the item to us. (People love receiving these.) Plus, it eliminates the possibility of him outgrowing an outfit and never wearing it.



Advice on Clothing to First-Time Mommies from a First-Time Mommy:

1. Resist the urge and don't buy every cute article of clothing that you see. Purchase only one or two things that you can't live without!

2. Think comfort over cuteness! Imagine having a newborn crying hysterically who just spit up all over himself needing to have his diaper and outfit changed. The last thing you want to have to do is unbutton his shirt, take it off, and then take off his pants. You get the picture.

3. Don't buy any newborn-sized clothes because baby won't get to wear it for very long!

4. Wait to buy any clothes. People will be gifting clothes for baby. Buy them when you stop getting gifts. You can't predict when this will happen and by then, baby will be bigger so hold off.

5. Invest in several one-piece sleepers! I recommend the ones that cover their feet. (Look at the photos below)

6. Consider the time of year/season when your child will be born when purchasing any clothes. Your experience might be completely different from mine. Since Ben was born during a terribly cold winter, we haven't had many opportunities to take him out. So, we haven't really had the need to dress him up in nice "outside" clothes.



One of Ben's drawers is filled just with sleepers.


I really like these kind that cover their feet.


This is the kind that I don't like as much because it requires that I put socks on him. I'm lazy... I know!


Can anyone relate to my experiences with baby clothing or do you have any other advice for first-time mommies on this?

Savor Every Moment

Look at him puckering up those tiny lips. I love him!

Every time I look back at this picture, my heart melts. As I leaned in to kiss Ben, I remember wishing to have the ability to freeze time. At that moment, my mind was completely focused just on "Ben and mommy time". Nothing else mattered.

It's moments like these when I remember the advice that I most received while pregnant. "Try not to sweat the small things and enjoy every second with the baby." It sounds pretty obvious, but it's really tough keeping this in mind when you're "on-the-go" every second of the day and still have so much to do.

I try my best to focus just on Ben when we have our time together. Sometimes, it seems as if time is so slowly passing by. But then I realize it's already been close to 8 weeks since he entered this world. I don't know what my life would be like without him. Time really has flown by.


Advice to first-time mommies from a first-time mommy:
Try not to sweat the small things and enjoy every second with your baby.

Yes, your home might not be as clean as it used to be. The laundry might not get done as often as it used to even though you have an extra load of baby related items. And, lots of things won't be the same. You'll have to adjust to this, but trust me... it's worth it.

First Birthday Party/Family Outing

One of our few married friends, Jacquie and Jason, were married 11 months before us. They had a beautiful daughter, Jasmine, 11 months before us. Ben and Jasmine were both born in 2009, but as you can see from the photo above, Jasmine looks like such a big girl compared to little Ben. Jasmine can hold her head up, can sit up, has a reaction to situations, can walk with guidance, and can crawl really, really fast. Ben can't do any of these things yet (and that's okay). Thing is...I just can't believe they're the same age! When I look at the students in my class, I view them as all being 9 and 10 year olds. I've never thought about how different they are developmentally and in terms of their maturity based on their birthdays. Malcolm Gladwell knew what he was talking about in his book "Outliers".

To celebrate Jasmine's first birthday, we gathered together at Jacquie's parents' house in Long Island and had so much fun. It was the first time that Joon, Ben, and I have gone out together for a family outing. This was not only our first outing, but was also Ben's 2nd car ride.

Being the worry-wart that I am, of course, I had a long list of concerns. What if Ben needs to be changed while we're driving? What if he doesn't stop crying? What if he gets hungry in the car? These were just a few of my worries just for things that could happen while we were en route to LI. Then, some of my other concerns were: Where would I put him down when he falls asleep? Where would I feed him? Since I'm exclusively breastfeeding him, I always worry about this. Some bf-ing moms feel comfortable feeding in public, but I still haven't tried it nor do I think I could do it. Joon even bought me something called a "Hooter Hider" which is basically just a piece of beautiful fabric that's used to give you some privacy from the world while feeding, but I still haven't used it. I'll eventually try it sometime when it gets warmer, but I'm dreading that day.

Ben slept through most of the drive there and when he started getting fussy, his binky came to the rescue. When we got there, Jacquie told me that I could use one of the bedrooms to feed him, so that's what I did. I fed him and changed him there. He did so well that day. Just a few cries here and there, but other than that, it was a good outing. I worried for no reason.

I'm sure things will get easier and I'll be less anxious as we do this more often. I'm hoping to be a pro by the time the weather gets better since we'll be able to go out more. I'll get lots of practice. I can't wait!

A Week of Smiles

When going through training to become a teacher, one has to take classes in psychology and child development in addition to those in education. Everyone told me that having this additional knowledge would be great especially for when I had kids. I never thought that having this knowledge would actually be detrimental!

Whenever Ben reaches a milestone in his life, yes, we celebrate with hugs and kisses! We feel as if he's accomplished something huge each time. But, when he doesn't do something that I think he "should" be doing according to child development, I worry. What if this... what if that... And those of you who know me, I worry too much to begin with. Plus, having recently attended an autism workshop while on maternity leave hasn't helped either. They always say, " Every child is different in his/her development" and I'm so used to saying that to parents during conferences, but now that we're speaking about MY child, things are so different. (I'll have to dedicate an entire post about my shift of perspective on dealing with parents of my students. More to come later...)

I had been worried for some time (5 days) because Ben wasn't "socially smiling". There were those subtle ones like that little smirk on his face after a good poop. You know exactly what I'm talking about! Those worries, however, quickly went away when I realized that he had been smiling all along. Ben smiles with his eyes. For some reason, I had expected those smiles to look differently. Maybe a bit more exaggerated with giggles and such. Don't ask me why!

Ben smiles randomly throughout the day. The best is when he spots one of us early in the morning. He tries to make eye contact. Then, he looks straight into our eyes and greets us with the best smile. As every new parent can attest to this, this makes our hearts melt.

What's especially rewarding now is the fact that there is something being reciprocated. Up until now, he just stared into space, ate, and cried when he needed something or was uncomfortable. It was hard having one-sided conversations all day while being alone with him for 9 hours from about 8 am-5pm. Although he is still unable to have a spoken conversation with me, he's able to contribute to our conversations with his smiles and coos.

I admit that I do still feel lonely during the hours when it's just Ben and me, but I have to say that things have gotten much better. He shows me that he loves me his subtle ways. I just have to be on the look out.

Let this be a source of strength and inspiration to newer parents who are feeling lonely and anxious. Your child WILL reciprocate some form of affection and it'll feel SO good! Hang in there.